Reflections and Jubilation

School and Addiction, a match made in hell: 

Saying I had a smooth-sailing high school life in Thalun would be an obvious lie and looking back, I wish I could blame my inability to realize my wrongdoings on my immaturity, but recollections are painfully sharp and I can accurately remember. What can I remember? I can remember how a developing mind can easily be sucked into the voids of gaming addiction. I was addicted to the mobile game Mobile Legends back then and would play it all the time. I would eat my lunch during the short break and then play during lunch. I would think about the game continuously, conversing with my friends about the outplays I performed during a match the day before, or compare statistics on how many kills we differed by. I was so addicted to the game that many teachers(Mr. Min) would regularly inform my parents. Once I got back home that night, my mom scolded me relentlessly while my dad would shake his head. While I would feel bad about the faces my parents made at my actions, I didn’t make attempts to fully shake off my addiction. Momentary withdrawal from the game which usually lasted no less than a week would be stopped as I picked up and continued gaming again. The teachers would realize the return of my addiction and would express their concerns to my parents again and the nights that followed would again be filled with dread and sadness. Imagine this occurring again and again for 2 years. Each argument would crack our family’s peace and accumulate. The big break came when I saw my mum crying, losing complete hope in a son who she unwaveringly raised for years. I felt an immeasurable amount of guilt and sadness I never felt, and I decided it was time. It was time to stop the madness that would consume and destroy my family.

This is a very personal piece of information I hold dear and is not something I talk about to people I do not know. But I write this in a school blog where many students and teachers visit and I chose to provide my little personal journey to shed a little perspective. I see many young students consumed by their addictions to various entertainments today and I have no right to tell them to stop. But addiction is a true monster. When I was addicted to ML, I would not only think about the game during class times, I would even think about it before I slept. The “epic” moments that I experienced in the game are amongst the most frequent things I plagued my mind with all the time. Why is this bad? It is bad because life is so much more than pixels packed in an LED screen coded to animate and react to you. Being addicted is not only doing it over and over again, it is also thinking about it over and over again. The addiction restricts you into such a small box that you cannot even comprehend many other things in life more worthwhile and beneficial than your game. I am grateful to have escaped the claws of gaming. I saw major improvements in relationships with teachers and relatives and I was confident to face them again. But the most beneficial change you’ll realize is the change in your work ethic, your maturity, and your realization of how detrimental your addictions would have been to your future. 

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